June 17, 2013

Challenging Our Core Beliefs

  1. Remember that our beliefs are not the same as reality, yet most people act as if they were. We see our beliefs as the way things are rather than as our perceptions or judgments about the way they are.
  2. Our beliefs are powerful and often unconscious drivers of our behavior. There is a good body of research that indicates the power of our beliefs. What matters most is not what is happening, but what the person believes is happening.
  3. The mind is "right" about whatever it happens to believe. We perceive selectively what confirms our point of view, and we even go so far as to set up situations to prove our point of view. If we believe we are deserving of success, we find evidence to prove it. If we believe that most people care only about themselves, we will prove that too. If we believe that life is beautiful, then that is what will come back in the form of our experience.

June 6, 2013

Active Listening...

Did you know that an average person only listens at an effective rate of less than 25%. Yet listening is rated as the most important factor in work, family, and social success. This week make a commitment to stay in the present and actively listen to the person speaking. Here are a few helpful hints to further develop this vital skill.
  • Maintain good body posture and eye contact. Don't try to mutli-task while listening
  • Focus on the speaker's feelings, needs, and perceptions.
  • Silence your inner dialogue and stay open to receive what is being said.
Keep in mind that what you are hearing is not always exactly what the speaker is trying to say. Stay engaged, ask questions, and actively listen until the speaker confirms that you have indeed understood their message.